…because of an empty glass.

about a week ago, i talked about using yourself up.  of taking advantage of who you are and making the most out of it.  of appreciating your being.  so while continuing to make good use of myself, this week i decided to use others up too.

as a social worker, i spent four years learning about the importance of being resourceful.  i learned that  it’s not so important to have the answers to every question, but rather, to come up with the right kinds of questions.  for me, being resourceful means that i am able to admit that i can’t do it all by myself, to be willing to ask for help.  i guess i learned something in undergrad and grad school after all, because that is exactly what i am doing.


my best kept secret (or maybe not-so-secret) is to rely on others for help.  and while i am quite aware of the number of downfalls and flaws associated with that type of thinking, so far, it has worked out wonderfully.  you might try to convince me otherwise, but i truly believe that everything has something amazing to offer.

because i am the kind of person that tends to (and truly enjoys) continually work on improving myself, i set personal goals on a daily basis.  literally.  but most importantly, i follow through with them.  the whole point of setting a goal  is to accomplish it- or at least work towards it. to give up what you might like in this moment for what you hope to have in the future- whenever that might be.  i create and set goals  to challenge myself,  to continue to grow, and to remind myself that they only way i will get closer to becoming the kind of person i would like to be is to work on it today and every day.   another reason i set daily goals is because like many other people, one of my favorite things about “to-do lists” is being able to cross off all that i have accomplished…. to get things done.  i set goals because each day i want to become better.  and i think that is a good goal to have.


most days, my goals are quite simple.  but more importantly, they are always mine. they are not defined by what others want or what i “feel” like i should be doing.  so while some may appear to be lame, trivial, or a waste of time/effort to some, they always mean a lot to me.


and so here is where using others comes in.

to be clear, i do not mean this in a negative way.  when i say “take advantage of someone else” i am not implying that you should misuse someone’s talents or kindness.  nor am i suggesting that you befriend someone to benefit yourself.  in fact, when i say this, i don’t mean anything negative at all.  what i mean is that you are surrounded by amazing people.  and that these wonderful people probably have something to share.


appreciate what people have to offer.

when i am having a bad day and need a smile or a good laugh, i know exactly who i am going to call.  on days when i feel like i need someone who can listen, i take advantage of one friend’s ability to listen to what i am saying without spending the entire time thinking of a response.  and when i am lost on the subways (like i usually am) i use up people’s kindness and ask for help (while being cautious of safety, of course). but it also goes beyond that.  i enlist the help of others so that they can use themselves up too :)


today was meaningful because in the process of trying to live more healthy, i started a challenge with a friend who has similar goals.  we decided to send pictures to each other of our steps, improvements, and motivating words. we ask each other for help.   another friend is helping by recommending healthy new recipes.  my boyfriend and i decided to start cooking together more.  and because another goal of mine is to become more knowledgeable about the world, i’ve also enlisted the help of many other friends to share their interests, information, and talent with me, so that i can expand my horizons.

maybe this kind of thinking is a little bit selfish of me-although i would never intend for it to be…but i also think letting people help you can help them too.  sometimes people forget how wonderful they are.



while my outlook on life tends to be a “glass half full” or “i’ll make the best out of just having a cup,” i guess what i really like to see are empty glasses.  of things being used up. more specifically, of personal strengths, talents, and characteristics being put to use.  maybe it’s because of my grandma’s mentality of  being satisfied with an empty plate because for her, it means that someone enjoyed her cooking and meal.  for me, this empty glass perspective means that nothing was wasted,  that everything was put to good use.  that people are using themselves up.

we are all resources.

set a goal today.

if you can’t do it by yourself, ask for some help.

and even if you can do it, perhaps let someone help you :)


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