oceans and mountains.

Processed with VSCO with f2 presetOut of all the things there are to love in this world, people are my favorite.  I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about all of the hearts I am connected to and how grateful I am to have so many pieces of people’s lives intertwined with my story.  Like the man from Budapest who told me about his daughter’s dreams while in Paris or the father I hugged when he got his son back.  I think about the chance encounters that became my greatest friendships; your desk being placed next to mine because you were shy and I was not.  I think about you crossing oceans and me moving to the mountains and both of us sitting next to each other on a hardwood floor in a circle, hands on our hearts. I think about all of us applying at the same restaurant as we made our way through college and dancing the night away eight years later on my wedding day. My heart thinks about you, all of the people that have read my words and then became my real life friends.

My heart overflows with gratitude when I consider the details that occurred in order for our lives to touch, the miles and miles we each spent walking the earth that resulted in your footprints making their way to my path.  I’ll always believe that people show up right when we need them, to help us grow, to open us up to the possibilities, to carry a message, or to hold our hand in comfort after a particularly stormy chapter.  I think about the people I’ve come to know who live their lives in the boldest, most beautiful, and magnificent ways.  The people who teach you to be soft, who show you how to be honest and vulnerable, the ones who dare to change their paths to answer to their life’s calling.  And I think about all of the people I do not know and all of the hearts that are beating just like mine.  I think about entire populations of people that many of us know nothing about, who do courageous things and suffer in ways we cannot possibly understand. I think about all of the people sewing beautiful seeds into their corners of the world, who leave roots for things to grow in every place they touch.  I imagine picking a flower they once planted or sitting underneath the shade of the tree they helped to grow.

 

With my blankets astray and snowflakes falling from the sky from my third floor apartment, I think about the ways in which we enter people’s lives. The ways our own feet lead us into another person’s story and create lasting change.  We can show up in the world in big and small ways,  like the way we carry ourselves, greet a stranger, or stand in a check-out line.  We show up in the ways we use our talents to benefit another person, pursue our passions with every fiber of our being, and how we make a person feel about themselves.  We choose the way we treat the people we love and the people we do not know.  We can be soft while showing up strong, we can withdraw judgement and seek to connect, to extend a hand.  We can help people to see the magic that they are.

I think about my yoga teachers, who without words, showed me how I want to be present in other people’s lives.  In the last four months I’ve learned about the gift we offer to people we meet and the people we love when we are present and kind.  I’ve learned that the more compassionate and gentle we can be with ourselves, the more compassion we can show towards others.  I’ve learned how valuable it is to see each person as a whole, to take note of their heart, and to make room for someone to be just as they are.  I was able to transform in beautiful ways because my experiences, challenges, and strengths were not only validated and seen, but celebrated and encouraged.  I developed as a person because my heart was nurtured, my words were listened to, and my vulnerability was met with sweetness and love.

 

When it comes to loving people, here is what I know:

  • Powerful things happen when we allow people to be who they are instead of who we want them to be.
  • People transform with compassion, not shame.
  • When we nurture another human being, we create an opportunity for healing, softening, and growth.
  • We have the power to impact someone’s life in just one conversation, evening, or experience.
  • I believe when we show up authentically and vulnerably we encourage others to do the same.
  • We can stop trying to fix people and focus on loving them instead.

 

 

 

 

and so I thank you, for being who you are and showing up in the way that you did.

in big ways and small ways.

I needed you.

what we think.

Processed with VSCO with f2 presetI am participating in a yoga teacher training and a few weeks ago we started to study the manomaya kosha; the mind.  The parts of ourselves that include thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and images.  We went through a practice that included observing our thoughts and we were asked to begin noticing a habitual running of sentences through our mind.  As we were guided through the practice I found myself internally saying ‘I don’t know how to do this, I’m never going to learn all of this’ asking,”am I doing this correctly?” and similar variations.

What I know is that our thoughts are often snapshots of our underlying core beliefs; beliefs that feel imbedded into who we are and often consciously or unconsciously guide our emotions or behaviors.  For most of us, these beliefs fall into a “I am not _____ enough”  statement.  Maybe you fill in the blank with words like worthy, strong, attractive, skinny, nice, competent, loving, masculine, successful, wealthy, good,  or popular.  Regardless of the adjective, the beliefs turn into feelings of lack, a general feeling of not being enough.

During this practice, I learned of a sentence that quietly runs in the back of mind, a belief that often masks itself in feelings of fear of failure, unsureness, and unease about my level of competency.    When I introspected a little bit deeper, “I am not smart enough” came to mind.  I went back to kindergarten where I saw my 6 year old self standing in front of my sweet teacher, feeling panicked and unsure about whether I would be able to successfully count to one hundred.  I went back to 3rd grade when I failed a cursive handwriting assignment after writing all of my “f’s” backwards.  Or in 4th grade when I was pulled out of math time while learning division because I wasn’t catching on as quickly as the other students.  I recall being surrounded by wonderful friends who were more intelligent, bright, and quicker learners than myself as a seventh grader in junior high.  And I can remember how embarassed I felt in high school after failing the AP calculus exam and learning that all of my friends had passed. I can hear the kind people in my life saying things that were internalized in a way that was perhaps unintended; “you have that lowest ACT score out of the group, but we are glad you are here,” and “we just wanted to spend extra time with you since it was taking you longer than everyone else.”  The statements were harmless, but over time the words somehow blended together into an internal statement of “I am not smart enough.”  This transpired into actions of excessive study, obsessive focus on success, and feelings of failure.  It resulted in an undertone of feeling inadequate and sometimes placing extreme pressure on myself with expectations of scholastic perfection.  This meant that I cried when I got less than an “A” on an assignment and felt panicked after reading the first question on a test.  I felt unsure of my innate ability to learn and of the likelihood that I would be able to succeed. I didn’t  know this about myself until recently.

 

I share these words with you because the homes that are our bodies exist on foundations of beliefs, experiences, and learnings.  I am not _______ enough exists within us all.  It is worth taking a look inside of yourself, asking where your insecurities may lay, and getting to know where those little sparks exist.  I say this because perhaps you’ll find they are not true, that they no longer serve you, or that you might come to know where they came from.  And maybe from this place of knowing, you might begin to see yourself in a more complete way.  You might find that your life experiences have other information to show you.

 

And with a little work, a more balanced thought might arise after allowing all of the other thoughts to settle.  One that says I am competent, able to learn, and intelligent.  One that says I am smart, strong, capable, and deserving. One that says I am enough.

I share all of this with you in hopes that you’ll start to notice the thoughts that cloud your mind, that you’ll start to hear the stories that you tell yourself, and that you’ll start to shake and loosen your grip on the beliefs that that feel real but are not true.  In hopes that  you’ll allow some room for love and self-compassion in.  In hopes that you’ll heal.

In hopes that you begin to deeply know that you are not broken. 

 

because we change

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Think about all of the transitions you’ve been through during this season of your life.  Maybe you’ve began to raise a beautiful human being that exists with an infinite amount of possibilities or  became a beginner again as a new college student.  Perhaps you’ve had to navigate this portion of your life without the comfort of a hand you’ve previously held, tiptoeing  atop the earth knowing that a part of your soul is in the sky.  I like to think that parts of our selves,  like leaves, fall to the ground during autumn too.  And perhaps the only thing we will ever come to know is that it all changes; the leaves, the weather, our existence.

 

I moved to a new state four months ago and said goodbye to some of my hearts greatest treasures.  I left a job I loved and became surrounded by new people, the mountains, and a different culture.  I became a stranger in a city I once somewhat knew, lost again amongst all of the streets and forever trying to find my way.  There’s nothing like change in the literal and figurative weather to stir things up inside, creating room for us to reflect, grow, and heal.

I like to think of our individual cracks-  the hurts, disappointments, setbacks, heartbreaks, failures, traumas, and losses- as the same veins that characterize our favorite marigold yellow, burnt orange, and red leaves.  For the leaf, these veins carry vital nutrients; for us, the life lessons, experiences, and unknowns meant only for our hearts. I believe that some of our most beautiful lessons can be our most painful experiences, if only we might be able to find the meaning deep within ourselves.  Within each crack is the ability to be transformed and soothed. I am not suggesting that we forget, but am gently offering that we don’t have to hold on to everything.  I believe we find the strength in our healing.   The trees teach us that we must learn to let go, that we can find sweetness in the fall.  My sweet friend, we can be shattered and still rooted to the ground.

 

During this transitional period of your life, what would you like to let fall to the earth? We can let go of people that are no longer parts of our stories, experiences that only remind of us of pain.  We can let go of the beliefs we’ve held on to about ourselves that feel real but are not true.  We can let go of expectations about we are supposed to be be, knowing that we don’t have to be everything for everyone.   We can let go of the messages we’ve created or received about our worth and allow old behaviors to fall away, making room for something new.

We can offer ourselves more time, sunlight, or compassion.  We can be good to ourselves so that one day, we will open our eyes and find that everything is covered in light again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

my dear friend, our favorite season of fall only exists because things change.

you’ve transformed in beautiful and difficult ways; this is your gentle reminder that we can do hard things.

 

on the choices we make

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We each have moments in our lives where we wished we had chosen differently or are unsure of how to proceed.   For me, these moments exist in the mean spirited action I participated in as a junior in college or holding on to relationships that were not meant for me;  in times when thoughtless words were spoken in moments of frustration and in gestures of unkindness to the people that I love.  We get so busy, tired, and hyper-focused on our problems that we act out of habit or automaticity and engage in actions before recognizing our choice.  If we stopped for a moment, we might observe our tendency to make decisions based on the way we feel and the incessant thoughts running through our minds rather than from the place in our hearts that are the truest expression of who we are.

Maybe for you, that moment existed today, yesterday, or last year. Or maybe it hasn’t happened yet; perhaps it’s a decision you are contemplating but have not decided on, a fork in the road between the person you are capable of being and a decision that is easy, convenient, or safe.

This is a simple reminder that our lives are characterized by actions; that every single action or inaction made is the result of a choice.   And all of these choices bear fruit; they have consequences, slowly shape the story of our lives, and plant seeds that will eventually take root. Take a moment and think about the hundreds of small choices wrapped up in all the minutes of the day… when you choose to go to sleep, who lays beside you, and whether or not you push the snooze button in the morning.  There are choices in whether you wake up to a moment of gratitude or three cups of coffee, extra sugar.  Choices exist in the words we speak, how we express our emotions, and the kinds of people we allow into our lives.  The people we let stay and the people we let go.  We have choices in what we consume, how we feel, and the way we move our bodies. Choices in the purchases we make, the money we do or do not save, the activities we engage in, and the information we take in through the brightly lit screens on our telephones, computers, televisions, and games.  Decisions also exist in what we choose not to do, like not finishing the degree, not quitting the job, or establishing healthy boundaries for ourselves.  You can decide to quiet your voice or shout from the top of your lungs, to pause, or to constantly move from one place of busyness to the next.  Maybe you routinely make the decision to treat yourself with less love and kindness than you deserve.

This is my encouragement to choose to respond to whatever challenge you are facing with your highest self.  With the part of you that can look beyond the immediate situation and shift to a larger perspective.  This is a reminder that we can choose to show up in every situation with the parts of ourselves that are calm, compassionate, honest, wise, and healthy.  And on some days and in some moments you might be able to rationalize your actions even when the deepest part of yourself knows you are wrong.  Maybe you’re frustrated and justified in your anger, but you still have the choice to let go of that hurt.  You still have the choice to move on, to accept what is, and to forgive.  You can take a step in the direction of your goals despite how difficult the journey may be, and no matter how unmotivated you feel; this is a gentle reminder that changes happen in our lives only when we choose to make them.

You’ll encounter situations that break your heart and still you can choose to put the pieces back together, to heal, to love deeply, and trust again.  You’ll meet people who are hurtful and unkind and you can still offer them grace and the light that you are.   And when you can’t offer that, perhaps make the decision to not act.  Your choice is in the inaction, in the pause. You may find situations that challenge you, and you can choose to try, to learn, and to grow.

 

When we choose to act in congruence with the best version of ourselves- with the light and loving kindness that exists within all of us- we slowly start to become all that we already are.

we exist in the depth of our choices.

 

 

a year’s reflection

 

 

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2015 was a good year.

 

i spent the year engaged to the most wonderful human being on earth and i got to wake up every morning to go to a job that i love.  i ran my first half-marathon, passed my licensure exam, and thoroughly enjoyed the process of planning our wedding. i went for nighttime runs in the park and had dinner with my parents in their backyard.  i watched a lot of sunsets and learned new things.

 

but if i am honest with myself, i didn’t show up for people the way i wanted to.  and in some important moments and simple day to day life experiences, i didn’t show up in the ways i would have liked to. i spent more time complaining and identifying with the negative than i did in investing in happiness, gratitude, and enriching my well-being. i found myself so caught up in being busy that i forgot to live slowly, to enjoy the only moment we are ever promised–right now. i didn’t have as good of an attitude as i would have liked and i was less patient than i know i can be.  somehow and somewhere in 2015 i got off balance; i spent less time engaging in the things that i enjoy like reading, spending time with family and friends, spreading positivity, and forming connections. i spent less time writing and creating.  it’s taken me a while to realize it, but i didn’t feel that inner happiness that has always been so comforting.  i was searching for the ease that i had been living with, but found it harder to come by. 2015 was different from the ones i’ve had recently in ways that i do not fully understand and it was still a good year.

i think it’s important to be able to talk about the times that we fall. to talk about moments when we didn’t live up to our values, expectations, or goals. to be able to say that we have failed or didn’t quite make the target.  i think it’s important to be able to talk candidly about the disappointment we feel or the heartache we are recovering from. the sadness that still lingers after a loss or a setback or the hurt that we try and push away. and i think we only grow when we can be honest in stating that there are some things we will do differently next time.

 



 

i’d like to take better care of myself this year. to honor my time with myself. to find balance between outside commitments, personal goals, and life obligations. i’d like to spend more time being quiet with a warm cup of tea or a book in my hand. i’d like to wake up early in the mornings to write gratitude on my heart and to expand my mind with beautiful words. i’d like to form more connections this year and deepen the relationships that i’m already blessed with. i’d like to be more conscious of the energy i am investing in and harvesting inside. i’d like to be gentler with myself in knowing that i’m trying my best and i’d like to observe the constant flow of thoughts that drive my perceptions and feelings. i’d like to create inspiration and an infinite amount of moments filled with love.

we can talk about all of the things that we want and all of the goals held so close to our hearts. we can read all of the blog posts and books and  listen to all of the motivating speakers and podcasts, but it we do not take action and make the decision to live differently on a consistent day-to-day basis, we remain the unchanged.  sometimes taking action means sitting peacefully, offering yourself a moment to wind down and welcome the moment as it is. and sometimes it means fighting off every excuse to remain stagnant and become uncomfortable. so for me, this year is about saying ‘no’ and being more cautious with my time.  it’s about being mindful of my thoughts and aware of my tendency to fit everything in at the expense of enjoying the moment.  i’m being more intentional and developing new habits. i started writing every night.

 

slowly, with concerted efforts and gentle reminders, we will get there.

but we must know where we are headed.

 

 

 

 

and so with an open heart, a calm mind, and my face tilted to the sun, i welcome 2 0 1 6 .

i welcome today.

right now.

this breath.

… because of letters to strangers.

dear stranger,

i wrote you a letter once and i’ve thought about you a lot since then, mainly because life continues to present its experiences to me and i like to think that we are here in this world learning together.  i like to imagine the two of us meeting in a coffee shop with mismatched furniture sipping on our favorite hot tea and exchanging bits of wisdom learned from the struggles we have endured, the tears we’ve cried, and the moments we have celebrated.

i think the thing about advice is that we can share it, but only through experience and overcoming our individual struggles do we ever really understand.  i think pain, discomfort, heartache, uncertainty, and raw emotions are necessary for our growth and important in realizing the richness of life. perhaps the lessons learned from my pain will be different from the ones you learn in yours; and maybe we offer these things to each other so that our individual discomforts can be different, although shared, and somehow that is comforting. and so i’ll give you my words in hopes that you’ll get from them something that you need and in hopes that you’ll know that wherever you are, we are both here.

i hope you are always learning, dear stranger. that you look at the world through eyes filled with wonder, curiosity, and imagination. i hope you fail frequently and continue to try. that you view the simplest pleasures through the earnest eyes of a child. i hope you create beautiful things and use all of your senses.  that you read interesting books, seek out new adventures, and have deep conversations with someone you hardly know. i hope you listen to the news and read things that challenge your beliefs, i hope you write down poetry and sing silly rhymes. i hope you paint. that you walk. that you touch nature with an explorer’s heart.  i hope you listen more than you talk and that you love before you judge. and i hope you know the world to be simple, complex, and wonderful.

 

dear stranger, we let go of so many moments in our rush to get to the next one.  i’m always learning that if  you don’t pay attention, you’ll miss out on this moment. i hope you don’t wish time away. you’ll miss kindness in the eyes of the cashier, the sound of a small child giggling, and the crunch of the leaves underneath your shoe.  when we get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of the sickness that is busy, we don’t slow down enough to experience the rise and fall of our breath, witness the sun set, or smell the scent of a cool summer’s rain. we don’t hear what our parents are saying, feel the love that other people are offering, or notice a stranger’s attempt at connection.  although i understand the lure of the future, the draw towards tomorrow, and the excitement of what will be, i also recognize that we do so in exchange for the now.  what i know is that it is about today.  right now.  this exact moment is your life.

when we constantly reach out for distraction, use our time for mindless scrolling, and focus on the world through a screen, we give away the opportunity to practice patience in moments of frustration and to understand how we truly feel.  dear stranger, please put down your cellphone and live in what’s real, in what’s right in front of you. when you are with your friends, family members, strangers, on the bus, driving in your car, in a work meeting, trying something new, eating dinner, relaxing before bedtime, or celebrating something momentous, put down your phone.  i worry that pretty soon we will have lived a life of moments captured, but not truly enjoyed. and we will be left with a life that is unlived. unnoticed. and unappreciated. turn off your phone for a while, my friend…. we don’t get these moments back.

 

i’ve been learning about quality in this last year.  the quality of the relationships i have with friends, family, and my community. who i call and who calls me back. quality work, lessons, experiences, and tasks.  i’ve come to understand that part of developing quality is about being selective and that it is also about time;  choosing how you spend it, what you give it, the amount offered to it, and whom or what we give it to.  you don’t have to accept every task, article, or thing to do; you don’t have to accept every argument or conversation. decide what will add value to your life, who will enrich your worldview, and what will bring happiness and then do these things.  gently let go of the rest.

pay attention, my friend.  notice what you offer the world and yourself through the words you mutter underneath your breath, in the background noise of your mind, and in exchanges you have with people you love and the people you don’t know. focus on the quality of the time, energy, and effort you offer to the world and notice how it comes back to you.  are you here?  are you present? what message are you sending? what lessons are you teaching? what energy are you allowing to fill up your soul?  what relationships are you giving of your heart and your time? and is this the way you would like for it to be?

 

and when it comes to love, i hope you have the courage to let go of somebody who doesn’t love you. that in your search for a companion, you get to know yourself first, accept your shortcomings, and make peace with your flaws. i hope you let love come when it does and in the meantime you celebrate the wholeness you already are.  i hope you don’t accept misguided attention to escape your loneliness, and when your heart gets broken dear stranger, i hope you know that you are still complete. and when you are in fact lonely, i encourage you to seek out connection rather than half-hearted attention.  connect your heart to someone else’s, someone who understands your worth.  recognize that you are enough and start to learn all of the ways in which you convince yourself that you are not.  take time to listen to the background noise that plays throughout your mind and learn that you don’t have to believe every thought you think.  and remember that your value is not dependent on another person’s acknoweldgment or acceptance.

 

i hope you take sometime to look for the cobwebs that may exist in the corners of your heart and decide to let them go, clean them out.  past anger, unforgiven hurts, and feelings of inadequacy or not being enough.  listen for those whispers that cloud your mind with feelings of anxiety, disappointment, sadness, or hurt.  replace them with self-love, compassion, empathy, and gratitude.  and remember dear stranger, other people’s happiness and successes are not the absence of your own.

 

i hope you don’t let your dreams pass you by in exchange for the easier route. i challenge you to create routines and put forth the energy needed to accomplish your heart’s mission. nurture self-discipline and foster the habits necessary that will lead you to your goals.  i hope you find something that you are passionate about and live it.  i hope you fight for something that is larger than yourself and become all that you already are. and while you are on the way, take care of yourself and tend to your own garden. wish others well. give yourself permission to be strong and in the same breathe, to be soft, to be unsure.  take the time to practice being you and drown out the unnecessary noise that tends to clutter our lives. and most importantly, show yourself some kindness as you grow.

 

dear stranger, give out pieces of your heart without attachment or expectation. share your love, give out kindness, and shine your light.

 

 

remember that it’s all beautiful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the three c’s.

we have a lot of choices.

the collection of words we string together to use for self-expression, the inflection of our voice, the focus of our thoughts, and the depth of each breath. we determine the amount of energy we invest in our goals, the perspectives we take, the direction in which we lead our lives, and the topic of conversations we speak about.  we get to decide the kind of responses we have to other people’s words, behaviors, and life situations. and we choose what we allow to make us angry, how we let it influence our day, and how to let it go.

what i know is that sometimes we forget that in each individual moment we can choose. and without awareness of these choices, it becomes easy to respond out of habit or initial reaction instead of in a way that promotes inner peace, contentment, and happiness.  and so a seemingly isolated incident of frustration can lead to a day of irritability, a week of anger, and a month of gloom. and after collecting these thoughts and holding on to these lingering emotions, you might start to feel like you are out of sync with yourself, discouraged with the way things are going, or overcast with negativity.

i’ve learned that if you want a different outcome you must make a different choice.  this is important because our individual choices result in a collection of events; they directly impact the flow of our day and shape our thoughts, moods, and the relationship we have with our life.  our outward perspectives toward life are the result of our inner experiences and so it’s important to remember that the way we feel isn’t always the truest reality; often times, our experience is impacted by the thoughts in our mind, shaped by the emotions in our heart, and altered by the kinds of days we’ve been having. our days are colored by the thoughts and emotions we choose to entertain in our minds and hearts.


in the last few weeks, i’ve been doing a lot of grumbling.  i complain about too much sleep, too little sleep, too dirty of a house, having too much to do and not enough time.  i’ve been finding fault with strangers at the store, drivers on the road, and in the people i appreciate.  i’ve been argumentative with other people’s perspectives, contributions, opinions, and beliefs, and annoyed with the resulting disagreements and negative emotions that often accompany it.  as a result, i haven’t felt like myself.  i’ve felt anxious, dissatisfied, frustrated, disappointed, annoyed, lonely, or upset.  not only do i not like to do these things, i also don’t like to feel these ways either. so of course, i started to think.   and before long, three c’s came to mind- condemnation, complaints, and criticism – and slowly i started to remember all of the ways in which i have the choice to separate myself from them. and so here i am, drinking hot tea in an adorable coffee shop, deciding to make a different choice.

here’s what i know:

criticism– when your attention is focused on a person’s misgivings, shortcomings, and flaws, you fail to appreciate the light they have to offer, the laughter a person brings, or the happiness they bring to you.  i know that constant attention to all that is wrong leaves us feeling ungrateful, unappreciative, and discontent.  criticism naturally makes us focus on the flaws in a situation and the more we identify our frustrations the more identified we become with them.  and so the more we complain, the more complaints we have.  soon, you might notice that all you can see are errors, flaws, and mistakes in any given situation.  as a result, all that you feel is dissatisfaction, anger, and annoyance. and while there is a time and place for contstructive criticism, it’s not for every place, every stranger, and every moment. i’d rather be an enjoyer of life than a constant critic of it and in this effort, i’m attempting to replace fault seeking and negative judgement with appreciation.  i’ll compliment more. i’ll search for the good.

condemnation– when we condemn another persons’s beliefs, opinions, actions, or life choices, we limit our ability to take on another person’s perspective. we lose empathy, tolerance, and openness.  i believe that condemning others- especially large groups of people- encourages feelings of superiority and further divides us from one another.  and when you condemn another person’s actions it becomes easy to disrepect and disapprove of the individual as a whole. condemnation is about judgement– a belief that your way of seeing and understanding the world is more accurate than another’s– and it’s about shutting doors.  and with a shift in focus, what i know is that i hope to use my life to open doors.  for other people, for opportunities, and for a greater understanding of the diversity and richness that exists among each human being.

complaints–  we complain about the food we eat, the vacations we take and the clothes we wear.   we complain about weather, work, and our morning commute.  about our sleep, the television we watch, and the co-workers, family, friends, or spouses we surround ourselves by.  and what i know is that complaints are hardly ever a positive reaction to the situation we are in.  we have become so used to expressing our dissatisfaction with a circumstance that we have forgotten how to express excitement, gratitude, and appreciation for what is. too often and too easily, complaining has become our natural response and makes it difficult to find beauty and satisfaction with where we are.  and the problem with constant complaint is that it fosters negativity, does not alter the situation, and results in unhappiness. i’ve began to practice recognizing that both people and things are imperfect and i’m trying to find value in learning how to appreciate these shortcomings. i’m choosing not to open conversations with a complaint or go to bed with words of dissatisfaction on my heart.

what i know is that these three words- criticism, condemnation, and complaint- are focused on the self.  they bring unhappiness and leave us cycling in negativity- all of which serve little purpose in our lives. you have the choice. you pick your words and choose your focus.  i challenge you to ask yourself what relationship do you have with the current moment? how do you choose to interact with your life?   what thoughts are you forming?  what words are you speaking? and what emotions do you have lingering in your heart?

what choices are you making?

and what will you do different this time?